Have you ever had your heart ripped out and torn into tiny little pieces? Have you felt discouraged? Felt like giving up?
Dillon's neurologist called today with the results from his EEG. He is having the same type of seizure that he had in December. In about 22 hours he had 23 seizures lasting 10-30 seconds each. It took 20-30 minutes for him to "return to baseline" after each seizure. They aren't causing more damage, they are a result of all the damage done to his brain at birth. Dillon has to go back on the Topamax. We are going to have to watch his weight very closely. There may be one other drug we can try if he loses weight. Otherwise we have to go to an injection that has very bad side effects, it is a six week long drug. I believe he would have to have a nurse check his blood everyday to monitor him because the chance of these bad side effects is so high.
I just want my little boy to get better. I praise the Lord for the improvements with his hearing, I haven't "forgotten" that blessing! It is hard to know, though, that his brain is still suffering so much, that his brain isn't recovering. I am reminded again of Luke 22:42 where Christ was about to go to the horrible death of the cross, "Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done." It is that part about not my will but His be done, that I keep struggling with! It is so hard to watch my little boy go through all of this. To watch him lay on the floor without moving (other than coughing) when he should be running around my house, playing, laughing, talking, eating, etc.
I am taking this news pretty hard, so if you think of it please pray for us. Thank you!